Chapter 47
WHEN SUCCESS IS FAILURE OR FAILURE IS SUCCESS
That was the title of my blog from yesterday. It flows nicely with the preceding chapter, in regards to detaching from “worldly things” and the ego.
Last night, as I was walking Neo, I was listening to Marianne Williamson’s podcast. She offers a free daily devotional, with roughly five minutes of audio explanation. Yesterday’s episode was titled “Living Successfully.”
In the podcast, she cites a passage from A Course in Miracles, which read: “Sometimes things you thought were successes were actually failures. And things you thought were failures were actually successes.”
Marianne said that true success is anything that helps you become a better human being. She used “becoming more humble” as an example. I’d like to also include the cultivation of the “fruits of the Spirit” as a measure a person’s true success: demonstrating more love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
When I listened to this podcast, I immediately thought about my radio days. From the world’s perspective, I had achieved “success.” I was popular, and generated a decent income. I had power and influence.
What I neglected to realize was how nasty of a human being I had become. I was completely absorbed with ego-dominated thoughts. In my mind, I thought: I built this radio station into what it is. I’m the most recognizable talent on the station. I’ve been here seven years. I run this place. Birmingham, Alabama, should be grateful I’m still here; after all, I’m one of the most talented night jocks in the country.
My “worldly success” had made me a human being “failure.”
I chose to put myself on a pedestal. When you’re looking down on everyone else, it’s hard to see your own reflection in the mirror.
As discussed earlier in the book, my decision to follow the guidance of my ego caused me to take actions that created tension with my employer. We agreed to go our separate ways. I became the “black sheep” of the radio industry—a risky hire. I put myself in that position through my inability to moderate the emotion of anger.
From the worldly perspective, I had just become a “failure.”
However, as Jones said, in Andy Andrews’ book The Noticer, “Sometimes, all a person needs is a little perspective.” This reminds me of what Dr. Wayne Dyer says, in his book Inspiration: Your Ultimate Calling, “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” Review Chapter 8 from Follow the White Rabbit for a better understanding of “proper perspective.”
When I left the radio industry—the only thing I’d ever known—I was presented with the option to change my perspective on the matter. In that decision, I could change the “worldly failure” into a “human being success.”
And that’s what I did.
Stepping away from the radio industry helped me detach from the ego. I no longer had to play the role of “Nick Nice.” I was finally free to express my “real” personality. Granted, there are natural elements of my personality that resonate with the “Nick Nice” character, but they’re not on display all the time. Whereas Nick Nice was always sarcastic and borderline-mean, Brandon is playfully sarcastic and rather nice.
Leaving the radio industry gave me the freedom to fully express my spiritual ideas. Under the control of the corporate umbrella, I always “held back.” I didn’t want to ruffle any feathers or freak anybody out. One has to walk a thin line in regards to being “inspirational” and trying to “get converts.”
Towards the end of my radio stint, I began to sew in more and more gentle, spiritual undertones. I still had to balance it out with the “Nick Nice” character, but the process had already begun.
Experiencing the worldly “failure” of my radio career gave me the opportunity to step into human being “success.”
I became more humble, gentle, and empathic. I began to laugh more. I started smiling in all of my pictures. I slowly began to view myself as a “normal” human being. Although some people still treated me like a “celebrity,” I was able to help them feel more comfortable in my presence. My decision to return to my legal name (Brandon) created a bridge; I could use it to help people understand that Nick Nice was a radio character. I invited them to call me by my real name—to get to know the “real” me.
They started to respond in more gentle ways. As I planted more compassionate seeds, I was reaping a more compassionate harvest. As I planted seeds of respect into the lives of others, they reciprocated by offering me respect. The most important element of my newfound “human being success” was the level of self-respect it created within.
As I began making decisions aligned with the Holy Spirit, I no longer felt the guilt, shame, and condemnation that comes from making selfish decisions. I no longer worried about “what other people thought about me.” I was finally comfortable, in regards to the human being I was becoming; I made decisions from a pure place—and my inner peace reflected that.
Overall, my “worldly success” while in the radio business blinded me from the “human being failure” I had become.
In contrast, my “worldly failure” in regards to becoming the “black sheep” of the radio industry, became the catalyst for my impending “human being success.”
Again, the quality of your life-experience will align with the clarity of your perspective. Had I chosen to not learn anything from my “worldly radio failure,” I would have been stuck in a place of suffering right now. Since I chose to “see things in a different light,” and make the necessary adjustments, I’ve been able to become a true success (as a human being).
Take this wisdom into your next feeling of “success” or “failure.” And remember, sometimes “successes” are really “failures,” and vice-versa.
My Truth says ... The Nice Life is all about choosing the proper perspective.
What does Your Truth say?